Strange problem I have…thoughts that cannot be put into words. My feelings are an odd mix of emotions that are completely foreign. I look around my world and see it so clearly, yet cannot put my visual inventory into phrases. It was not that long ago where I saw haze and had a million and one words to describe my findings.
Now, the haze has faded. The sunshine is out and the weatherman has given me an unusually positive forecast that involves exciting opportunities and a fresh start. The fear has subsided and been replaced with wide eyed wonder and self discovery.
With all this, still, I am speechless in wonder. My questions and self doubt are overridden. The pain that once was unbearable turned into strength. The love that I gave has been given back to me ten fold so that I can give it to others who deserve it, including myself. The excitement for what’s to come is nothing comparable to anything I can describe. My laughs are like wild fire, smiles the same. Stress still shows its face yet quickly exits.
How exactly do you describe something that of this magnitude? It’s more than a second chance. It’s much more than words. It’s more than feelings. More than self esteem. More than a gift. More than a smile. More than the most beautiful thing you can think of.
It’s happiness. And its mine all mine.
